Renowned romance writer Danico Apontellini left Milan in 1888 for America’s Old West in search of tale. After months of research, he wrote the classic best seller Low Fat Cowgirl, the story of a farm girl motivated by passion to lose the pounds and gain the man who spurned her. She worked hard from dusk to dawn until she rose to become the belle of the ball. Now every man, rich or poor, wanted to own her tempting joie de vivre. Vanity changed her. She now schemed to destroy the fat ego of the man she once desired in front of the global VIPs gathered at the governor’s mansion. Fate preserved her innocence and true love happened when a tall and dark stranger asked her for a dance. That handsome young man was a genius law student named Abraham Lincoln.
He wowed everyone with the greatest display of Flamenco dancing that set every woman’s heart on fire! Now history students know why he’s the greatest president ever! Man, that guy gets around! He was even on Star Trek where Captain Kirk was like I love you, man, and Abe was like, dude, I appreciate any man’s admiration of my rugged male beauty but I don’t swing that way, you dig, and Kirk was like no, dude, it’s not like that! I’m a hound for the ladies too! Let’s hang and hit the bars around NYU! And Abe was like you’re paying for drinks right? Yeah. I know. It’s illogical. What did you expect?I’m a product of the New York City school system and late night talk shows. I barely got my G.E.D. So don’t bully me!
Go pick on a Harvard or Yale English major!
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, it’s like, you know, Annie get your gun for being stood up by Abe who’s like at an uptown Harlem bar of chicks gone wild and he’s like shouting who wants freedom after gulping down another Red Bull vodka shot. Beam us up, Scotty. Abe’s not done for the night.
But we are.
Like, you know, we got a history term paper to turn in tomorrow?
Low Fat Cowgirl: The Motion Picture stars Lindsay Lohan and is directed by the survivor of the Hollywood death match between Clint Eastwood and Tina Fey. No, not really. But thanks for the fantasy anyway.
Hope it was good for you too (as if I cared.)
Low Fat Cowgirls And The Amorous Adventures Of Awesome Abe published in 1888 and reprinted in 2012 by Danny McLeod of the clan McLeod. And here comes Queen singing we’re the princes of the university.
http://lowfatcowgirl.blogspot.com/ (Don’t bother. It’s a bogus blog.)
He wowed everyone with the greatest display of Flamenco dancing that set every woman’s heart on fire! Now history students know why he’s the greatest president ever! Man, that guy gets around! He was even on Star Trek where Captain Kirk was like I love you, man, and Abe was like, dude, I appreciate any man’s admiration of my rugged male beauty but I don’t swing that way, you dig, and Kirk was like no, dude, it’s not like that! I’m a hound for the ladies too! Let’s hang and hit the bars around NYU! And Abe was like you’re paying for drinks right? Yeah. I know. It’s illogical. What did you expect?I’m a product of the New York City school system and late night talk shows. I barely got my G.E.D. So don’t bully me!Go pick on a Harvard or Yale English major!
Meanwhile, back at the ranch, it’s like, you know, Annie get your gun for being stood up by Abe who’s like at an uptown Harlem bar of chicks gone wild and he’s like shouting who wants freedom after gulping down another Red Bull vodka shot. Beam us up, Scotty. Abe’s not done for the night.
But we are.
Like, you know, we got a history term paper to turn in tomorrow?
Low Fat Cowgirl: The Motion Picture stars Lindsay Lohan and is directed by the survivor of the Hollywood death match between Clint Eastwood and Tina Fey. No, not really. But thanks for the fantasy anyway.
Hope it was good for you too (as if I cared.)
Low Fat Cowgirls And The Amorous Adventures Of Awesome Abe published in 1888 and reprinted in 2012 by Danny McLeod of the clan McLeod. And here comes Queen singing we’re the princes of the university.
http://lowfatcowgirl.blogspot.com/ (Don’t bother. It’s a bogus blog.)
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